ONLY IN KENYA

...where a debonair pizza gets to your house faster than an ambulance or the police

…where the police exchange fire with thugs but only toy pistols are recovered

….where millions of shillings on transit under armed guard are stolen in broad daylight without a single shot being fired

...where banks leave doors open and then chain the pens to the counters.

….where people run towards gunshots and bomb blasts instead of running away

...where we use the word "politics" to describe the process so well: "poli" in Latin meaning "many" and "tics" meaning "blood-sucking creatures".

…where the president holds a press conference to declare the legit members of his family

…where you find a zebra crossing directly below a footbridge (flyover) on a busy highway

…where a litre of bottled water is more expensive than a litre of diesel

…where a lady asks you out on a date & expects you to settle the bill

…. where the music is turned off in a club coz guys are watching the news

….where one goes to India to study and comes back with an American accent

….where trees have got nothing to do with the rain, rain just falls from the sky